Friday, September 16, 2011

Tips for Avoiding Affairs

No one knows of any surefire formulas for preventing affairs. Most people are tempted at some time. Marriages can recover from affairs, but avoiding them in the first place is much less painful. To recover from an affair, you must understand what happened, what the affair partner was thinking to allow the affair to occur, and what each of you can now bring to the marriage that will improve it and prevent this from occurring again.

Tips for Preventing and Healing After Affairs

• If you have an affair, see a therapist right away. Many couples survive infidelity.

• Discuss with your partner what he thinks he would do if he or she ever felt like having an affair. Tell him you would like the two of you to talk about it.

• Discuss and set guidelines together about what is appropriate and comfortable with regard to time spent with other people both at work and socially.

• Openly discuss affairs and possible affairs and your comfort with your partner’s behavior with people outside the marriage.

• Nothing you can do absolutely guarantees that your partner won’t have an affair, so don’t worry, make a strong marriage and enjoy the life you have.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Review: Siblings Without Rivalry

Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live Too
Siblings Without Rivalry
By Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish

How to Help  Your Children Live Together So You Can Live Too.
I have loved this book for years and recommend to my clients often. It brilliantly describes how to handle sibling rivalry but also encourages you to examine your own sibling rivalry issues that may affect your interactions with your children. Very illuminating, but easy to read. Like talking to a bright, articulate friend. To order click on book cover or here: Siblings Without Rivalry: How to Help Your Children Live Together So You Can Live Too

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Review: The Wealthy Spirit

By Chellie Campbell

Wealthy SpiritThis is a fabulous book. Chellie is an amazing story teller with great practical lessons.

I loved learning about sharks, dolphins and tunas. Goodbye tunas! Hello, richest man in Babylon. This book set me free to take action.

I am a clinical psychologist who specializes in high conflict couples and couples with young children. I have always had my own psychological issues about money probably because my dad often joked when I was in my teens that if it weren’t for his four lovely daughters, he would be a millionaire by then. When I confronted infertility in my 20′s, I felt I ashamed like I should be a millionaire already because we didn’t have kids.

As a result I had read a ton of books about money: personal finance, (don’t-buy-lattes-daily books), biographies of successful financiers, books on financial planning, the stock market, teaching kids about money and books on one’s deep psychological issues about money. This book is different.

This book finally cured my money issues. I became happy and stress free about money in my life. I couldn’t believe it. It even made me a better therapist.

Chellie not only gets the solid practical aspects of personal money management, she gets the psychological aspect of truly permanent attitude change about money with affirmations and stories. And her stories stick. Her book’s page-a-day format works great with my clients who don’t like to read or feel just plain too busy.

I read this book 7 years ago and it keeps on giving. My finances have never been better and more importantly my husband who had different big money issues than mine can now talk with me about money without feeling shame.

Recently, I finished Chellie’s Financial Stress Reduction workshop. The time was well spent as I got a lot more insight and handy tools for helping us make better financial decisions and make money stress free in our life. To purchase this book, click on the cover above or click here Wealthy Spirit

Monday, August 30, 2010

Review: Rich Dad's Conspiracy of the Rich

By Robert T. Kiyosaki
Clearest, Simplest Explanation of Money and Finance for the Lay Person I Have Ever Seen

Rich Dad's Conspiracy of the Rich: The 8 New Rules of MoneyI have read a lot of Robert Kiyosaki’s books and this one, in particular, does a great job of consolidating, condensing and covering much of his familiar material and relating it directly to the present economic situation. In fact, I would say his presentation of money and finance for the lay person is the simplest one I have ever seen. And his understanding and explanation of basic financial rules is excellent.

As a clinical psychologist, I find that this book—or any of Kiyosaki’s books—is very valuable for couples where one person really doesn’t understand investing or saving and another comes from a family where there is a lot of investment and saving and understands it well. Kiyosaki summarizes the tax system and tax consequences of different kinds of working situations. This information is also covered in previous books, but here again, the author has managed to present it in the clearest and simplest of terms.

Many couples continue to struggle with different financial philosophies without an awareness of the big picture. So it is very important for families to learn what he is talking about and to understand and consciously select which one of Kiyosaki’s four styles of approaching income and wealth that best suits them.

He wrote the book online and it includes comments from readers, giving it a very interactive quality. To be perfectly honest, most editors would probably cringe at his writing style. He is very repetitive in the way a good teacher is very repetitive. Some people find that frustrating. But if the contents are new to you, you will find the repetition helpful to give you a deeper level of clarity on the first reading. In other words, the redundancy may be irritating or annoying for anyone who likes well-written books. On the other hand, the way this author brings complex material to the average person with crystal clarity is amazing! To purchase the book, click on book cover at top left, or on this link: Rich Dad's Conspiracy of the Rich: The 8 New Rules of Money

Monday, July 19, 2010

Review: Positive Discipline

I can assure you -- Jane Nelsen is the Real Deal
By Jane Nelsen
Positive DisciplineIn my practice as a clinical psychologist, I’ve been recommending Jane Nelsen’s book for 20 years now and I can assure you – she’s the real deal.

Nelsen teaches parents how to use good discipline that teaches kids and helps them grow – it’s not just punishment. She espouses discipline that teaches. Using her techniques, the child is constantly learning and growing. Her key to discipline is that it is based on mutual respect – not punishment.

By creating mutual respect, your kids want to hear your opinion and advice. They are curious about it. Nelsen also focuses on how to let kids have control over some of their decisions and letting them experience consequences.

Positive Discipline is the main book that outlines the key principle. Other books in the series, such as Positive Discipline for Teen Agers and Positive Discipline for Toddlers, are extremely on point about the practical day-to-day dealings that you have with the child at the age that each particular book focuses on.

Her books keep getting updated and republished because they are practical and very loving. I just can’t recommend Jane Nelsen highly enough … and the whole series.  Click here or on Book Cover to order Positive Discipline