Monday, May 3, 2010

REVIEW: The Dance of Connection

The Dance of Connection: How to Talk to Someone When You're Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed, or DesperateHow to Talk to Someone When You’re Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed or Desperate
By Harriet Lerner, Ph.D

This is a wonderful book that focuses on the healing effect of finding your own unique voice and speaking your own unique truth.  Dr. Lerner helps you find this “authentic voice” and shows with example after example how it can help to heal marriages, families or friendships.

Dr. Lerner shows the benefits of being thoughtful and considerate of what you are saying before you blurt out something you don’t really mean. You are not necessarily speaking your own truth if you say the first thing that comes into your mind, she cautions. Her book is aimed at the relationships and connections between men and women and shows how to maximize the chances of getting a meaningful response based on how the other person responds.

This book offers very good examples of how to re-connect, even when there have been really horrific cut offs of not days but years, or when a family has a history of cut offs.

I have often recommended Harriet Lerner’s books in the past and will certainly recommend this one.  Readers who liked her other books will love his one. I did.

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